MIL & her sister are nuts Vent LONG

[papbouv]

MIL & her sister are acting terrible Explanation:My half sister married my husband's uncle we all had the same last name they were married 43 years he passed away this last Monday Cancer came back after 8 years in remission.OK my sister was upset he died at home Hospice had been in & out for almost a week & a half.The uncle who passed did not want his two sisters to see him when he got bad being the protective brother to his two sisters.My sister asked the Hospice nurse to contact the other family members.She called my house left a message on my answering machine her name said she was the Hospice nurse and would we please call her & she left her number.I got home called my sister house Hospice nurse answered the phone she said my BIL passed would I come so I left for my sisters house. The middle sister called the nurses number and the nurse told her too, the older sister called the house by then my sister was answering the phone.She told the older sister.Well the middle sister called was screaming over the phone at my sister told her she killed her brother and screamed cussing my sister out.My sister hung up on her,she called right back I answered the phone she cussed me out I hung up on her too all she did is scream at us she would not listen to anything we said.She called again we would not answer the phone these two sisters knew their brother had Lung cancer & brain cancer, 8 yrs. earlier he had colon cancer. He had signed a Medical Directive back in 2005 so my sister followed his wishes.The two sisters acted like they did not know he was going to die???they also did not spend too much time with their brother before he got bad. I told my sister he who screams the loudest is the guiltiest on spending time with their loved one.Here it is 5 days later & they are still causing problems to the point on my husband told me to hang up on his mother she called back and he hung up on her too, because she was screaming at both of us.Sorry for the long vent but do not know what to do about these two screaming sisters. The one middle sister says the Hospice nurse left a message on he answering machine saying her brother was dead. I told them both the nurse would not do that she left her number asking them to call her Any Nurses out there to back me up.???Papbouv

[Kathy]

I'm so sorry you are going through this. Hang in there. I think there just trying too justify them not being there for him.  Good luck.

[klsb]

Sisters are just like that... i reccomend pulling a Dashie and hiding under the bed till the yelling stops..

Sorry for your loss and the crazyness that followed

[Dee Dee and Hallie]

It's bad enough to lose someone but this makes it that much worse. I'm so sorry Papbouv. I hope things have settled down by now?

[papbouv]

MIL talked to her son after the widow explained a few things that they (sisters) did not know she wrote them a letter  copied the 1st one so both sisters got the same letter.MIL was a sister to the one who passed away & my hubby's uncle.
The widow is my half sister I still think it was very wrong to scream at my sister just about 2 hours after her husband passed . It was very wrong for the middle sister to tell her she killed her brother.No way my sister did everything Hospice wanted + it was very new to my sister she never had taken care of some one dying, As for me I had been a nurses aide 31 years so I helped allot just tried not to do any lifting.Papbouv

[lunakat78]

:headbang:I am an er nurse, not much contact with hopsice but, you are correct the hopsice nurse would not call and leave a message stating the bother passed, most hopsice nurses are very caring as they have chosen a career path to help people pass on comfortably. Leaving a message is cold and callous, very atypical. Also it appears the screaming family members are in the angry denial stage of grief. Sorry they are taking it out on you and you husband, some people just don't deal well when a loved one passes. Sending hugs your way. Also wanting to say how awesome it is your a nurses aide, I feel you guys are way under appreciated! You Rock!